Chart Readings #113
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This week we have an Aquarius who wants to stay friends with their Gemini ex, a Sagittarius with big feelings for a Leo, two Scorpio suns and a Scorpio moon in a FRIEND/LOVE TRIANGLE, and a Virgo who re-invented her life but feels something is off about her new Scorpio man.
Question 1
Hi Astro Poets,
I am married to a lovely Aries. There is no doubt in my mind that Aries is my home (so to speak). He gets me like no one else can, we have a lot of common interests and our lives are so intertwined that it goes beyond just us.
However, I am not writing about Aries. Three years ago, mine and Aries's relationship was in a rut and I met a Gemini sun. This Gemini set my soul on fire and we began a relationship (Aries and I were experimenting with open marriages at that point). With Gemini, I felt that I can be myself and that he likes me for me. Not me as a wife, a mother, a daughter in law, or whatever title you want to label me as. My arrangement with the Gemini was that he has to tell me if he starts another relationship as I had no intention to leave my marriage with Aries.
Long story short, Gemini lied and started a relationship with another woman, and we began a cycle where we would break up and get back together. It was toxic but it was hard for me to resist him. Gemini moved to another country mid last year and our relationship started unraveling because of the distance. At the same time, Aries and I decided to work on our marriage and we are now more solid than ever. Gemini and I had a fight last week and unlike in the past, Gemini has stopped reaching out to me. This is very unlike him as he would usually reach out to me if we have a fight and then we would make up and get back together. I have reached out and more than anything, if there is no salvaging the romantic relationship, I would like us to become friends. Gemini has not replied (it's been a week or so).
My question for you is: is this finally the end for us? I would like us to be friends and continue to be in each other's lives, and I can see myself reaching out to him again if the right circumstances strike, but a part of me is wondering whether I should just save myself from this heartache by also terminating contact. If anything, it hurts me that he does not want to stay in touch considering what we went through already. Is it just me? Am I the problem and should I just leave him alone?
Thank you both!
Love from an Aquarius who would like to stay friends
My chart:
Sun - Aquarius
Moon - Sagitarius
Rising - Aries
Venus - Aries 12th house
Mercury - Aquarius 10th house
His chart:
Sun - Gemini
Moon - Cancer
Rising - My guess is Pisces as it fits him
Venus - Cancer
Mercury - Taurus
Dear Aquarius,
Both of these are strong astrological matches. Aquarius and Aries is a lifetime match and one that is both cerebral and full of intense passion. Aquarius and Gemini is like two best friends reuniting and needing to say very little in order to understand one another.
But here there is distance involved now, and a long history. Your ask to stay friends is made complicated by both of us. And while it’s a very sweet ask, and where your heart is, it may be that there needs to be some time between you both. Some time in which you move on with your lives and don’t need each other on this—what seems like—weekly level.
That might also further strengthen your marriage. Aries are not a needy sign but they like to be needed themselves. Relying more and more on your Aries partner will give them a lot of confidence. And Geminis are historically quite erratic. You shouldn’t start guessing why this one decided to stop speaking now. Maybe it was personal. Maybe it wasn’t. Your history is there. If you want to pick this up again with time, that’s probably possible.
Our advice is to focus on what is in front of you and near you. As an Aquarius you are quite good at that. One thing that really makes Aquarius and Aries work is that in their differences, they have mutual respect for each others’ excentricities. This Aries clearly loves you. And you clearly love them. Lean into that. You’ve worked so hard to get here.
Wishing you more and more love.
Question 2
Hi Astro Poets,
I (Sag, she/her) have some big feelings for my brother’s best friend (Leo, he/him). I have known him for close to 16 years, as he and my brother have been best friends for all of that time. I would also like to note that I am 3 years older than him. I am 28 and he is 25. Sorry this is long, so get comfy.
I feel as though over the years we’ve been kind of flirty with each other. I also feel as though I’m not a good judge of those things. But outsiders have told me that we both seem flirty with each other. I’ve had others tell me that they think we would be a great couple, and after hearing it so much, I’ve developed strong feelings for him. I would say I’ve liked him on and off for a very long time, but I have felt this consistently about him for almost three years. For as long as I can remember, the three of us (my brother, him, and myself) would all hangout together at least once a week. Whether it be watching movies, going to the drive ins, playing mini golf, etc.
However, in November of 2021, he got a girlfriend, who was a childhood friend of his. I was devastated and it took me awhile to get over it (clearly I haven’t really gotten over it). However, in August/September of 2022, he broke up with her. Apparently, she was very controlling and would not let him see any of his friends.
It took him awhile to start coming around again, but slowly he started hanging out with my brother again and I got to see him more often and feelings started flooding back. We had a party this New Year’s Eve that he was invited to and it felt like we were the flirtiest we had ever been with each other. We sat on a two-seater bench together and shared a blanket while sitting next to a fire for hours.
That night made me realize that it was probably time to tell him how I feel. Over the years, I never felt like I could say anything because he was my brother’s best friend and I didn’t want to ruin the relationship or make it awkward between my brother and him. But I knew it was time to tell him so that either something could happen between us, or I could move on and get over my feelings.
I ended up telling him that I have feelings for him in February of this year. I asked him to meet me, just the two of us and kept it really low key. I told him I have been having feelings for him as more than a friend and that I owed it to both of us to tell him. He ended up telling me that he could kind of tell I had feelings for him, and he admitted that he has had feelings for me in the past, but also never felt like he could say anything to me because I was his best friend’s sister. He also ended up saying that he feels like he needs to be single right now. And he talked about how mentally he still feels not great. (He has confided in my brother about not being in the greatest mental state, probably because of his breakup and everything he went through with that).
I left thinking that I could start to move on, but the part about him having feelings for me previously and how he feels like he needs to be single “right now” kept nagging at me. I ended up telling my brother that I told him I had feelings, and my brother seemed upset and awkward about it, which makes me nervous that he wouldn’t support a relationship between his friend and I.
I was able to focus on myself for awhile but I have been seeing him a lot again recently because he’s been hanging out with my brother a lot. This past Memorial Day weekend, we took a family trip for a weekend away and he came along with us. He was very flirty with me the whole weekend. However, I can’t tell if it’s actually flirting, or if he’s just trying to keep things feeling normal. But it seemed like he was being extra flirty than normal, and others noticed and said something to me.
I’ve seen him a few other times since and it feels like he’s been flirty. I feel stuck though, because it seems like he might have some sort of feelings, but maybe he’s still scarred from his most recent relationship (it’s been about 9/10 months since they’ve broken up). Some of his comments recently make it seem like he doesn’t want to be tied down and wants to have a fun summer with friends. He’s very outdoorsy and likes to fish, so he’s talked about how he’s going to devote all his time this summer to fishing.
I feel like at this point I can’t say anything else to him because I made the first move by telling him I had feelings for him. I’ve tried to make it obvious that I still have feelings for him, hoping that he might initiate something with me. I’ve been told by others that if I want a relationship with him I’ll probably just have to wait it out and see what happens, or just move on. Would love your take on this situation!
My Chart:
Sun: Sagittarius
Moon: Capricorn
Rising: Gemini
Mercury: Sagittarius
Venus: Scorpio
Mars: Leo
His Chart:
Sun: Leo
Moon: Scorpio
Rising: Unknown
Mercury: Leo
Venus: Cancer
Mars: Cancer
Dear Sagittarius,
Well, first—you get big points for being your direct Sagittarius self and telling him. Leos also love directness, especially when it is someone telling them they like them.
To be totally honest, he seems to be giving you the signs that while there is interest, he wants to explore being alone. But just like a relationship, this won’t last forever (not to sound like all things end but…well…all things end!).
Leos are tribal. Meaning they love their tribe. Their tribe is their friends. He will always return to that. And his last girlfriend sounds like a terrible fit for a Leo. Because Leos don’t mind making sacrifices, but they do mind if that sacrifice is their friends.
You seem to understand that, which is good. But you’re also in a very complex situation. Being the sister of his best friend. Leos are incredibly protective of their friendships. One of the big reasons he may not be exploring this with you is because of your brother. And there’s not much you can do about that. So try not to drive yourself crazy.
The feelings between you two will likely still be there. With time, you will either find someone else (and this may be what it takes) or he’ll get more comfortable with approaching you (you do say he has been more flirty).
Try to enjoy your summer and enjoy your time with him. But don’t put pressure on it or expect anything concrete. Just so you aren’t disappointed. See what happens. But don’t put yourself in a state of waiting.
There are so many people out there. And he will likely always be your friend. Again, this is something Leos protect at all costs. They are more loyal to friends than romantic partners.
Much love from us.
Question 3
Dear Astro Poets,
I can’t tell if it’s the cosmos or if this was a long time coming. It’s a lot of background but any way I slice it I feel like a terrible person. In any case, I appreciate you giving me a space to write this all out… thank you in advance!
We are all in our mid twenties, which seems cliche but that is exactly—not to co-op Christian fundamentalism speak—the season of life we’re in, I guess…
(Nicknames for anonymity)
Me
Sun: Scorpio
Moon: Cancer
Rising: Gemini
Mercury: Sagittarius
Venus: Scorpio
Mars: Virgo
Rose
Sun: Scorpio
Moon: Libra
Rising: Sagittarius
Mercury: Sagittarius
Venus: Virgo
Mars: Capricorn
Patrick
Sun: Libra
Moon: Scorpio
Rising: Gemini
Mercury: Libra
Venus: Scorpio
Mars: Sagittarius
Context:
Two years ago, I met Rose at work and we became quick friends. We have similar world views and we really get each other. A few months later I met Patrick, also through work. We also hit it off, particularly sense of humor-wise and while we didn’t know it at the time, we’d learn that we have incredibly similar backgrounds (and trauma—I know, annoying and predictable to bond over trauma, but it’s the truth). Since then I’ve been very close with both of them for different reasons and care about both deeply.
I had a feeling they would get along too, so I introduced them and the three of us in addition to a fourth became a close knit friend group. For months, we did everything as a foursome and spent a lot of our free time together, had a very active group chat, the works. As people are wont to, Rose developed feelings for Pat but never pursued it because Pat frequently spoke of his desire to stay single—he’d recently gotten out of a 7+ year relationship that ended in a very toxic way and wanted to be clear about what he wanted.
However, late last year they began a situationship. (This also contributed to the erosion of the friend group). Being friends to both, I was caught liaising in a quasi-Shakespearean capacity, never speaking for either but encouraging both to be more candid. Though they went on proper dates, it was always a bit fraught. They talked through things frequently but never seemed to really be speaking the same language—there were so many miscommunications along the way and I was caught in the middle. Things ended poorly in April. They agreed to go back to being just friends but shortly after Rose saw Patrick kissing someone else and it was just too soon and the wound was a bit too fresh. They haven’t talked since.
Side note:
When I first met both of them, I was in a serious long term relationship (and it was LDR). I discovered he’d been cheating on me and ended things in February. Since then I’ve been healing and dating and having lots of fun being single (in a great city for single people).
NOW FOR THE REAL DRAMA:
On the night of the recent Sagittarius full moon, I was out with just Patrick and he kissed me and confessed his feelings for me. He even said he’d thought about dating me and told his mom about me even though he’d maintained previously he wasn’t ready for a relationship—in his words, he never told me otherwise bc he thought I was “Friendzoning” him. In that moment, I realized I may have feelings for him too—admittedly, I kissed him back. But I felt awful after. So awful. I felt like I had cheated on Rose as a friend. And Patrick and I have talked since but he’s also #AvoidantAttachmentType so it’s been hard to have a fearless and vulnerable conversation with him. And my friendship with him is more important than any amount of chemistry or feelings I have for him, and I told him I wasn’t interested in pursuing this.
I confessed to Rose the earliest chance I had and that I would do whatever it would take to earn her trust again. I promised that it wouldn’t happen again (which I believe). She said she would be uncomfortable being my friend if I remained close with him (in her eyes, more so bc he is someone who hurt her, but I think that’s a partial truth, I think that is the simpler narrative). She said needs to know I am on her “team”—which I am. But I hate having to choose between my friends. Is there any reality where I can stay close with both of them?
XO
Dear Scorpio,
What a Scorpio drama this is! You all have major Scorpio placements. Two Scorpio suns and a Scorpio moon at play. Things definitely are going to get messy. And have!
Here’s the short end of it. You did nothing wrong. And either of them putting you in a situation where you have to choose just shows that you’re all in your 20s. And that’s great! But as you get older you’ll see that making someone choose…well, it never works out. They should both be able to handle the reality of what happened, messy as it is—especially because you had no intentions to hurt anyone or complicate things.
Scorpios take everything extremely personally. On a soul level. You understand this, of course, as a Scorpio. So Rose is going to stew on this for months, maybe years—and either let it go, or not.
That’s not on you though. You were brave and honest and vulnerable and told her what happened. And how you see the road forward. Let her think on that. Without backtracking on anything you have said or promising anything about not keeping contact with Patrick. In some ways, that’s too big of an ask if she knows how important your friendship with him is. And with her, too. You’re the one in the lose-lose situation here if either of them pull their, “well choose” card.
Patrick is probably not going to let this get too messy as a Libra because he wants to keep equilibrium. Libras do not like to let drama surface. But Scorpios will do that. Let it surface, that is. And it could become an explosive situation between someone who is avoidant and someone who is being honest.
You’re in the middle of it. So our advice is: protect your heart and also stand up for yourself. Life gets a lot more complicated down the road. You all have the ability to get through this with some time, patience, and understanding.
Question 4
Hi Astro Poets!
A little backstory. I’ve spent the last few years of my life drastically improving myself. Got promoted at work, lost a LOT of weight, invested in my creative pursuits, and overall have gotten more comfortable with my personality. (I’m a Virgo Sun with a Leo Moon). As a result of all this new confidence, I find myself feeling playful and hopeful.
With all those changes came the realization that my relationship at the time had run its course. My ex (Virgo Sun, Taurus Moon), and I parted on mostly amicable terms after some initial hurt feelings. Since then, I’ve met this amazing man. He is separated and working through a divorce, but still seems to be on friendly terms with his soon to be ex wife. He’s mentioned he still loves her but knows she isn’t who he needs. He’s also mentioned in passing having some issues with flirting with others while married to her.
Our physical chemistry is like nothing I’ve had with anyone else. We have very similar senses of humor, like many of the same things, and he has the type of witty, word-based humor that drives my bookworm heart crazy. He seems utterly into me and devoted to us. Our relationship is still fairly new (not even a year), but I’m loving the intensity he brings to it.
However, I’m noticing that between these amazing feelings is the sense that something is off. I can’t put my finger on it, but I feel that he’s holding back from me about something, or not being entirely sincere all the time. Is this just my Virgo self overthinking because of his comments about his previous actions while with his wife? Any advice would be appreciated.
Me:
Sun: Virgo
Moon: Leo
Rising: Scorpio
Venus: Libra
Mars: Capricorn
Mercury: Virgo
Him:
Sun: Scorpio
Moon: Capricorn
Rising: Leo
Venus: Libra
Mars: Sagittarius
Mercury: Scorpio
His Ex:
Sun: Aquarius
Not sure of the rest
Thank you!
Dear Virgo,
You sound like a catch given your self-awareness and putting it into action. Great work turning a new page in life! Virgos cannot be stopped once they are motivated.
It’s hard to answer your question regarding your new Scorpio man without much context but here is the thing. Scorpios are the sign that takes the longest to open up. They are calculating, secretive, and quite wounded — so they will protect themselves at all costs.
The way to earn a Scorpio’s trust is to be consistent and honest. That on repeat for months/years.
All of that aside, there is some room for concern regarding the comments about flirting. The truth is, we all flirt. But if he singled this out, it’s likely been a bigger problem for him. And yet, him having the confidence to tell you that also indicates it is something he’s worked on, or is working on.
Unless you have any kind of proof, I wouldn’t confront him on this. Or torture yourself too much about it. Believe people, until they prove you otherwise.
The off feeling for Virgos sometimes has to do with trying to find an imperfection, or a place of instability. Virgos want to know exactly what to protect themselves against, so they can sometimes create their own problems for themselves. I’m sure you know this. I’m sure you also have great intuition.
Let this unfold some more. A year isn’t hardly any time, especially if you are both coming into new versions of your life. You with your job and priorities, him with his ex and former marriage, etc.
Believe in the good. Until the bad is in front of you. But don’t court it! Allow yourself to feel good.